Thursday, 31 January 2013


My siblings avoid buying bread from the market, as they've been deceived into buying bread that's almost stale, a number of times.
Last Sunday afternoon, my mum said she was going to buy bread there, and a chorus of disapproval rose up from them.
Even though I had also been 'bitten' I didn't mind as I'm always open to giving others/things, second or more chances.
Dad reasoned with them that my mum's good at selecting fresh bread and all, but they didn't believe him.
They were of the opinion that until the bread was tasted, one couldn't prove it's freshness.
It was finally proven that mum got 2 perfect loaves!

Funny, but a lot of people are like them.
Some go through life expecting the same thing that once happened to them, to happen again.
Thinking in absolute terms, rather than relative terms, has become the order of the day.
Let me give an illustration of what I mean by thinking in absolute terms, rather than relative terms.
It's common knowledge that daughter-in-laws (DIL) are said not to get along well with their Mother-in-laws (MIL).

THINKING IN AN ABSOLUTE TERM: Now, if I got married with the determination that I have to battle my MIL before I can have a peaceful marriage, then I'll hold on to that mindset, not minding if my MIL is a wonderful woman or a difficult woman, who can be softened, greatly, by care. Instead of this giving me the peaceful marriage I crave, I'll get the exact opposite, especially if the woman falls into either of the 2 aforementioned categories.
THINKING IN A RELATIVE TERM: If I go into marriage holding on to the belief that despite the widely-touted belief that DIL and MIL are like oil and water, I will get the best from the relationship once I do the needful. A lot of people may come and feed me with "you're not going to have a peaceful marriage because you haven't put your MIL in their place" but the exact opposite would happen based on factors I'll discuss another day.
Based on the above illustration, thinking in an absolute term involves "I've been IRREPARABLY hurt by bad friends, so I WON'T have friends anymore"; while thinking in a relative term involves "Even though I've been BADLY hurt by bad friends, I know good friends abound, so I'll be careful not to choose bad friends next time, and if I do, I choose to choose, again".
There's someone hurting, who's reading this post; I ask that you give TRUST a chance, again.
Give Life a chance, again!
Give Love a chance, again!
Give Laughter a chance, again!


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